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INSANITY...
Thursday, December 21, 2006
SCHOOL
The 2nd semester's over. I just have to get my course cards. Hope I can still make it to the Dean's List. Haaaiiiizzz... There's nothing much to talk about school. Still the same rush hours, cramming of projects and paperworks. Good thing it's over now.
OBLIGATIONS
I know I have my obligations. But there are times (like right now) I really feel pissed about this "obligation" thingy. It's getting into my nerves actually. Or maybe I was the only one thinking it was some kind of obligation? Yeah, maybe. But can't I make a choice of what to do in this life? Why can't I just forget about it a few times in my life? Why do I always have to be there? Can't they make it themselves? Of course they can! I can quit anytime. But something's holding me back. But it pisses me off to be there just the same. And what I hate the most is not being able to do what the hell is right. Welcome to the Perfctionist ME. Damn. Why can't I do something else besides that for a while??? Is it a crime if I didn't make it there? I've been in the service for almost eight years. I've never felt this kind of freaking shit before. I've never been pissed off like this about this.. this obligation in my whole life.
FREEDOM
Yeah... Having an issue about Freedom. Something personal. Well, for the past days I've been a prisoner of my own house. I can't even go out and hang out with my college friends. How will I enjoy college then???!?!?! Man.. This sucks.
FAITH
Yeah... Right now I'm starting to question my faith. I feel like bullshit right now. And I can't believe I'm typing all this up. Maybe I'm just geting emotional or something. Why am I saying this? What the hell is wrong with me??!? Let lightning strike me to get this freaking shit out of me.
CHRISTMAS
I can't feel it yet.. I wonder why? Fuck.
Make me stop. Make me reret what I said. Make it stop...
>>Hours past midnight. I don't expect me to be writing rationally anymore. What my mind says, I type it down. I'm trying to remain sane in here. Get a grip of my hand... Don't let me slip away.. way, way down below...
+Let me hold you once more...+
Thursday, December 21, 2006
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